The crochet dress, at last

Now tell me that this dress doesn't look easy to make. (For those of you who don't crochet or knit or even randomly tie knots, hear me out for a few minutes. Then you can say, "That looks hard.") Doesn't it look a bunch of the same stitches, repeated over and over into the next millennium? That's what exactly what this pattern - about 500 shell stitches strung together.

Even so this pattern, circa 1971 and the year my mother had an outdoor baptism for somebody in my family, is difficult beyond belief. I feel like I need an interpreter and these instructions are written in English! I was about to go out of my mind and to Jupiter and back doing the first row on this dang thing (Can I call it that even though I'm only two rows into the project?). I needed to get 19 pattern stitches. I kept getting the wrong number - 25, 24, 23. So I keep ripping (and finding myself ready to roar) this dress back to the very beginning, muttering all along, "If I don't get this right soon I'm throwing in the paper towels and more and starting a bonfire."

Miraculously, I got that magical teen number early this morning, where else but on the train. I was ready to dance with the conductor and climb on the caboose and tap dance Charlie Chaplin style (only to be knocked over by a bridge as it always seem to happen in the movies). No, I stayed calm (I really need to stop doing that. Doesn't help anyone) and started on the next row. No fanfare, no drinks, no Dirty Martini or even a clean one!

But I must celebrate. It's the weekend. I've a long way to go on this journey. I need to have fun! I don't want this beautiful piece of attire to be a drudgery. (I'm using Gedifra Wellness cotton in an Ocean-blue hue for those who care.) Sometimes I get so wrapped up in those yarn-overs and counting those darn stitches, I forget to relax and enjoy the ride (we're talking the crochet adventure, not the locomotive, although the same could be said for commuting too).

There's probably a good chance that the dress will not be done in time for the previously mentioned SWAP (Sewing with a Plan) on Patternreview. Who cares? I've got something to do while I'm going places not so far and wide! I don't have to stare out the window, although that's good to do sometimes. I don't have read my neighbor's Chicago Tribune on the sly. I can be more productive than an assembly line! I can create a piece of apparel that I can brag about for years to come! I can drive myself crazy before the end of the summer! Anyone want to join me in my silly challenge?